I will be at school 4 the rest of the day if anyone needs me… I’ve learned my lesson, I should do my work when I’m supposed to.
Im quite pissed off with my brother. Theres a reason as to why we are not allowed 2 be together most of the time, he’s an ass. I want
Have you ever felt that what you are doing is wrong even when you like doing what you do. No, I am not talking about weird sexual fetishes. Instead, I am talking about my career choice, graphic design.
Graphic Design just doesn’t feel the same way it used to for me. I LOVE typography, business cards, layout editing, among other designy stuff. However, for some reason I am getting the feeling that I am meant to do more, something else.
Today I got my grade for my journal response for an article on street art as well as comments on my paper. Besides the classic grammar comments that I get, on the last part of my essay I got a comment from my teacher that says :”Wow! Are you sure you still want to be a graphic designer?”
Next to it, I wrote: “I don’t know.” It is true, I don’t know what I want to do for the rest of my life. I want to be an artist, that is all I know. I get an adrenaline rush when I am working. I’ve been told that you can tell how “passionate” I am about my work by the look of my face. I’ve also been told that I should major in sculpture, and in art history. I’ve been told to slowly consider what I want and the consequences that follow any decision.
I’ve been told many things but I have not talked myself in or out of anything, which is why I don’t know how to feel about anything. Nonetheless, I have really been contemplating why I like art hist so much.
I like the power it gives you. I like critiquing someones work and analyzing it. I like reading about art - it is like gossip time for me. I like writing about how I believe art should be and why it should be more “theatrical.” I have fallen in love with art history. Sure, I hated my first art hist courses but that is because I did not get a very good introduction to the matter of hist in art. Now that I have a great teacher telling me all this cool gossip in art, I GET IT! I know what art is. Art is BULLSHIT! And I love/hate that is all bullshit. It makes me want to change it and create new ideas for art. Now that I like art history I enjoy even more working on my ideas.
And its true, what the fuck would I do with art history? Truth is that I don’t know, yet. I will probably always be in search of a career anyways. I’ve always been an overachiever. I’ve always wanted to be more than one thing. I will never find what I want to do because I want to do everything. But I think that I’ve found the catalyst that makes me love art even more than I already do, and that is art history.
I will stay in GD for now, but I am (really) considering graduate school. maybe I will get a masters on art history, but I don’t know yet. As much as I hate to say this, I will say it: “all I know is that I know nothing.”
That is all for now. I will go on Monday to my art hist teacher’s office and find out why she thinks I’ll be good in art history. Maybe then I will know what to do.
After some thinking I am reworking the idea for my sculpture final. There is just no way I can go on with the plan that I had for this sculpture. It is stressing me out and when that happens I know that it is time to rework a project, otherwise I will become completely frustrated with it. I am not going to rework the idea 100% because that will end up frustrating me more.
There are several things that are annoying me of my sculpture plan as of right now.
- It is stressing me out. So I might end up not finishing it or not liking it.
- I am not going to be able to make it 3 feet or more the way I thought I could have it all set up.
- It is not coming together like I thought it would.
- I have too much metal that can be wasted if I continue with my “original” plan.
- Most of the class is going big and I am not.
So, since I fear not liking my sculpture more than not finishing it I have decided to rework my idea. I will still be using the circles I did because there is no point to get rid of them when I have already spent 2 weeks, 3 fingers, and one wrist in making this circles.
I am just going to build a tall new form with the rods. I will then have the circles hanging inside this structure with fine wire.
I know it might be sort of late to start with something more less new but for the reasons given above I think it will be better for me to do so.
I will post a drawing and a small model of this idea later on today.
It’s freaggin cold. I am bored and I am very very lazy. I will be watching chick flicks if anyone needs me.
I hate it when lil college freshmen (who are technically still high schoolers) talk at
fucken loud at the library when I am trying to study and just to talk about everything myspace. -_-
Makes me angry.
- Start working on Art Hist journals.
- Read for Theater about… Theater History.
- Finish reading for POLS test.
- Start typing POLS City Council essay.
- Finish drawings from Life Drawing.
- Come up with a magnificent way to sell my sculpture idea to my teacher.
THINGS THAT I SHOULD NOT HAVE
GOTTEN MYSELF INTO
(but i did)
- Finish that play’s flyer/poster thing by Tuesday.
THINGS I SHOULD REALLY DO
- Fix my resume 4 the Minero Magazine and print the application.
- Look for my layout work in the yearbook 4 the Minero Magazine.
SOCIAL STUFF AND OTHER CRAP CRAP
- Ask 4 forgiveness to a certain someone (rolls eyes).
- Demand Mundo to pay 4 Pucca’s drawing paper.
All that has to be done this week. Hopefully I will - at least - finish most of it so I can have a very good rest next weekend. More than likely dont expect to see me in a very good mood by the end of the week, especially if I havent finish most of what’s on my list.
But other than that it should be an ok week, or I will shoot someone :D
Nah I wont -_- anyways… sleep time.
Nope… early sleeping aint working…
I am very bored. I am thinking of going to bed early… maybe after I finish some reading.
So I burned my sculpture and now its ready to be installed tomorrow morning. I am happy with it. But I am very tired because of it. All of my body hurts after carrying the big torch and working it though the whole sculpture. Who said that being an artist wasnt painful!?
I do not feel like going 2 drawing class tomorrow. I think I might ditch it, but we will see.
I need a new idea 4 my sculpture final.
I need to start doing my art hist journals and my pols essay - but i really dont wanna.
I registered today :D
I wanted to take Metals but I’ll have to wait. It just doesnt fit on my schedule :/
I AM OUT! GOOD NIGHT :)
I should be typing my Theater essay as of now but I am not worried about it at all, which means that I will be doing it tomorrow morning at school.
I studied for my Art History test and I am not very worried about it either, but I will stay up for a bit more to memorize names, titles, dates, movements, etc.
I rock Art History so I should be ok.
Tomorrow I burn my metals sculpture. I have motor oil that has lost most of it’s viscosity, so the sculpture will burn like crazy. Expect updates on how it went tomorrow, maybe I will finally get to see a fire truck.
Weekend was ok but eh. I am bored, I have a headache, and I am thirsty so I am out! (of the net at least)
Oh and this is something I learned about today:
Joseph Beuys - How to Explain Pictures to a Dead Hare.
Performance at the Galerie Schmela, Dusseldorf